Top ten advantages of living in Tampa

Top ten advantages of living in Tampa:

10. Drinking tap water eliminates need to buy multivitamins with LEAD!

9. Indoor pests large enough to be claimed as dependents on income tax.

8. Just in case of alien invasion or puma attack —neighbors are well armed!

7. Pavement and sidewalks double as convenient cooking surfaces.

6. Friendly alligators help control stray pet and children populations.

5. Drive-thru booze, guns, and porn!!!

4. Perfect opportunity to combine love of cycling with subconcious death wish.

3. Hurricane season provides convenient excuse for your boarded-up windows and debris scattered on your lawn.

2. Complete lack of customer service helps to develop self-reliance.


and the number one advantage of living in Tampa...


1. Two words... "Flying Cockroaches!"

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